I’m sure you have encountered the concept of journaling because it gets tossed around in the industry for entrepreneurial and personal growth. In this episode, Kinsey shares her perspective on journaling and how it’s helped her make more money, stay connected to the long-term vision, and step into her life as a leader. She’s also going to take you behind-the-scenes and give you her unique process for journaling so you can take it and make it your own.
Episode 25: Identity Crisis
Do not miss these highlights:
03:09 If you are really not locked into the vision of where you're going, it's really easy to get consumed by all the drama.
05:47 I encourage our clients to journal as well. But I get asked, what's your process for journaling?
06:07 Why is it important to journal? I don't know if you've ever asked yourself that question.
06:47 What are you hoping to gain out of journaling so that you can build that habit for yourself?
06:59 If you're just creating something because you think you should, it will be hard to be consistent with anything.
07:52 It allows me to declutter my brain.
08:35 For me to be able to just unpack it is like, the most beneficial thing that I gain from journaling.
09:30 Most of our thoughts we don't even know we’re having, are derived from our feelings and behaviors.
09:57 I think of it like when I do my spring cleaning in my closet. I started to see clothes that I haven't really seen it for quite some time now.
10:22 I was able to bring those things to the forefront to decide what do I want to do with it.
10:37 I think the biggest mistake here that you really want you to avoid is to overthinking your writing or journaling process.
10:50 Do something with your journal where you don't have to worry about people seeing it.
11:35 When you go brain dumping, don't think about what you should be saying, or how you should be saying it. You're literally just letting the pen drive you.
11:48 From there, you're gonna get a compilation of your thoughts.
11:57 You're going to have the most obvious things, but then you're going to start seeing the less obvious things as well.
12:10 Just can kind of pause and reflect and see all the junk that you're holding.
12:22 I like journaling when I'm feeling heavy with thoughts or feelings, and I can't release it.
12:38 I get to see where I need to spend some attention to shift or reprioritize. Then I will feel like I am a little bit more in control.
13:01 You are not your thoughts. This process will give you that disconnect.
13:25 It's very liberating, and can give you a sense of freedom.
13:30 From there, you get to do some reposition, What do I want for myself in this moment instead?
13:50 Then sometimes I started to think about and embody a version of myself.
14:11 Now I can start to bridge the gap of where I am at the stories that I'm telling myself, and truly who I want to be and step into.
14:24 A lot of times I just have to let that emotion process. It's not about fixing it.
14:36 It's I who sees it and I let it just process. I’m not going to judge it.
14:59 Life and learning how to be in an uncomfortable emotion.
15:27 Just being truthful with myself about what's real versus what's not.
17:09 Journaling is documentation because we're not going to remember everything.
17:27 We're not going to remember the details. What created that or what was the result of that, or the process we had to go through to get there.
17:50 We can then get better at even breaking some of those patterns.
18:02 The other thing is probably the most important, is we get to see how far we've come.
18:40 But as you reflect on the growth and improvement and who you've become, that is the gold.
18:47 You can remind yourself of that and can prevent from completely self sabotaging yourself because you get into these loops.
19:12 This documentation, history, and then journaling, can help us straighten that out. It can pick up the patterns, but it can also remind us how far we have come
20:33 This process of journaling allows this very comprehensive, holistic exercise for us to gain that freedom, gain that clarity, see what's real, evaluate, move on, revisit, improve. It's such a beautiful process.
21:14 Until you can really experience that result that you’re seeking, you're more likely to not just be consistent with that habit or that thing, but you're actually going to amplifyyour results from it.
22:20 Understanding what does it mean to you, Asking yourself, what does this mean to me, and just pausing.
22:26 A lot of people are going to tell you what to do. But unless you know why it's good for you, you'll never be able to really see it through.
About the Host
Kinsey Machos, Marketing Strategist, is also a recovering people pleaser, self-sabotager, and corporate hustler. She helps entrepreneurs create and execute magnetic marketing and build expert brands so that they can get known, seen and heard online.
She believes that creating a business that’s 100% in alignment with SELF is one of the most important things that we can do as women — because there’s an inner magic that we all have if we commit to an infinite pursuit of discovering (and re-discovering) that.
As a wife and a mom of three, family takes priority. And having a business that’s run AROUND her lifestyle is a daily intention of hers.
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Welcome to captivate and close. I'm Kinsey Machos, business consultant and marketing strategist. And I'm going to show you how to attract and enroll high paying clients using my break through online marketing strategies, all without having to rely on complicated funnels, disingenuous clickbait, or spammy sales tactics. These are the messaging marketing and selling secrets that virtually no one is talking about. So let's dive in. Hey, you, welcome back to another episode of captivate close. So good to be here with you this afternoon, or whatever time that it is in your world right now. I am at the time of this recording, just watching fall come upon us. I just experienced funny weather. It's like sunny then rainy then dark then bright and all the things. So we're definitely starting to settle in to the colder months, which I'm totally good with. Although, here in Idaho, we have insanely long winters. Or I'm just getting older, I don't know. But it feels like the winters just keep getting longer. And my favorite seasons are falling spring and they just are not long enough here. But that is okay. We are heading into a high octane season, within my company, we're getting clear on the long term vision. And we're gearing up for some new things that are coming out and gearing up for our in person event in Texas, which is going to be so amazing, the vision is coming in to gather really well. And I can just feel this incredible momentum building, sort of like all things are really coming together, right. And this is something that I really want to hold space for you in really having that vision and knowing that it doesn't happen overnight. You know, I'm turning the corner on let's see my third to fourth year as a business owner, and it's been fast, but it's been slow. And I think, you know, I have had accelerated results, if you will. But it's all relative, right? In comparison to what. And some days, some days it feels too heavy to bear. Right. And, you know, we were just on Marketing Mastery within Ten K content collective and, and it's fascinating, you know, you can get so stuck in the weeds, it's like, Well, I haven't gotten a client in a while or I haven't, doesn't feel like it's working. And if you're not really, you know, locked into the vision of where you're going, it's really easy to get consumed by all the drama of or perceived drama of what's happening today. Right? Not feeling clear enough feeling like the plan isn't working, feeling like you're not good enough. All the things. But this this theme is truly, it's ultimately like are you in it for the long haul. Or not. And if you are just kind of hoping to make money super fast or become famous overnight, like good luck, good luck. And the journey from here to there, whatever that looks like for you isn't straight and narrow. In fact, it's really curvy, and messy and, and high and low. And if you don't have that vision to really anchor into,Kinsey Machos:
you'll be done. You'll burn out really fast. So it's super fun not to say that I am not experiencing right, those peaks and valleys of entrepreneurship, if you will. But the vision has been strong. And a lot of people will look at me and be like you're so consistent. How did you like how have you gotten where you are so fast? Are they you know, all you see is sort of like, what I'm doing or what I'm achieving? But what you don't see is how clear and strong I feel about the certainty of my vision. And so I hope that that's something that you can really start to look or evaluate for yourself and your business is like do I even have a vision like where do I want to go and and and Understanding that it's, it's several steps in between here and there, it's not just sort of like I do this, and this happens. So just encouraging you today, you know, I experienced summer was just such a fascinating time for me so much inner growth, business was funny and amazing, like record highs. And and then my just stepping into a new season of motherhood, which has been so, so beautiful. But then that comes with, like the contrast the inner turmoil. And when I'm ready to share about that I will, as I always do. But part of what I want to share with you today is that reflection period and that history, and I get asked a lot because I talk about my journaling a lot. And I actually encourage our clients to journal as well. But I get asked, like, what's your process for journaling? Right? And this is the same thing for like, content creation and things like that people want the system, right? How do you do it? And to be honest, it's like, whatever system works for you. It's the one that you're going to use. But I think it's important to understand, like, why is it important to journal? And I don't know if you've ever asked yourself that question. But I think when we start hearing about things that we're quote, unquote, supposed to do, and then we start doing them, but we don't really know why we're doing them. I think this was me several years ago. I mean, if you've read anything about high performance habits, even the actual book by Brendon Burchard, high performance habits, I think part of that it's been a while since I've read that, but he has a whole list of things that you should do, right? And it's like, Okay, I better do this. But then there's no sort of connection to why does that matter for you? And what are you hoping to gain out of that? So that you can get that so you can build that habit for yourself? It just goes back to to the vision, right? If you're just creating something to because you think you should, or because it kind of sounds nice, but you don't know why or where you're going with it is so hard to be consistent with anything. And so the same thing goes for journaling, I think a lot of people have been told, you should journal and it gets kind of, you know, tossed around in our industry or personal growth. But I wanted to share why I journal why I think it's important and the process I use because I think this will help you define what that might look like for you. Because I do think it's a very valuable process. And when I started to understand why I do it, and I started to extract the benefits of it, I was like, oh, okay, like I will never not journal. And I think that's the best thing you can do. So one of the things that I love about journaling, first of all, is it allows me to declutter my brain. If you're like me, you have a bazillion things going on in your mind. And you're managing all the things right? Not just business, but motherhood, marriage, your you know, for me, I've got three kids. So I'm thinking about all of their schedules, they're in three different schools. They're all in different activities, and in that constant shuffling. So it's like, there's so much happening in my brain on top of that massive add. And so just like the easily I'm easily distracted, and my thought loops can consume me so there's just so many things happening in my brain. And for me to be able to just unpack it is like, the most beneficial thing that I gain from journaling.Kinsey Machos:
And I think it's, it's fascinating, because I think that might not sound very crucial to you, but the amount of freedom that you experience, when you literally unpack your brain and put it onto paper, a, you will feel lighter, like physically lighter. But be you're going to start to see all the chaos that's happening in there. Sometimes you're you're only focused on the biggest or or most important thoughts, if you will. But what you're not hearing or seeing or bringing awareness to is all the other thoughts that you're having. I think they've said like you have 60,000 thoughts in a day. I don't really know this stat, but it's a lot. And most of those thoughts you don't even know you're having, and a lot of them are deriving your feelings and behaviors without you even knowing it. And so when you can really unpack that, see it on paper, it gives you like all of this space to work with to be like holy crap. I can't believe that I was thinking all those things, right. I think of it like when you do your spring cleaning. And like in my closet, I started to seek clothes that I haven't really seen before, because they've been in the same spot covered by the same things. And I overlook them every day. And when you go to purge, you start seeing things differently, right? And my husband will be like, Well, you haven't worn this in forever, like, I know, because I haven't seen it. And then I might want to wear it later, right? And so you have to bring those things to the forefront to decide, like, what do you want to do with it. So as you brain dumb, you're going to declutter, and also bring awareness to what's going on. And so the process here is literally you get out your pen. And I think the biggest mistake here that I really want you to avoid is like overthinking your writing overthinking your journaling process. So if you're wondering, like, well, who will see this? Well, let's, let's like, get rid of that thought, you know, do something with your journal where you don't have to worry about people seeing it. But also, like I told my husband, and like, he saw mine was like sitting flat out on on the bed somewhere. And I saw him like peek down and be like, what's this? Like? Oh, you know, that's my, that's my journal, my mess of a brain feel free to read if you want, but it's kind of scary, right? And like, his no desire to see that. So for you, it's thinking about if that is a fear, and this is something I never really considered, but I hear it a lot is like, I'm afraid that people will find it. Okay, so let's fix that. Let's make sure that nobody's gonna find it. And worst case scenario, if they do.Kinsey Machos:
You know, how can you, you know, consider that ahead of time. So the point there is like, Don't overthink this process, when you go to brain dump, don't think about what you should be saying, or how you should be saying it, you're literally just letting the pen drive you. It's fascinating, you don't have to think about anything, you just brain dump. From there, you're gonna get a compilation of the thoughts, you're having the feelings, you're having the the big challenges that are going on in your life, right, you're going to have the most obvious things, but then you're going to start seeing the less obvious things as well. And you're going to bring a lot of clarity just in that in that space of brain dumping. But then you get to just kind of pause and reflect and kind of see like all the junk that you're holding. My favorite time to journal is not necessarily when things are going right, which I should probably do more of throughout the day. But it's usually when I'm feeling really heavy with something right thoughts or feelings, and I can't release it. And so I just I just start journaling. And when I kind of see all these things, I get to see like, what's actually true, what's not true, where do I need to spend some attention to shift or reprioritize. And you will feel like you're a little bit more in control. It's sort of like when you read the Untethered Soul, a lot of that focus is really taking a backseat to your, your thoughts, and you get to separate your brain from you. Because you are not your thoughts. And this process kind of gives you that disconnect. So if you're feeling embarrassed, or you're feeling shameful, or you're just feeling so overwhelmed about money or your relationship, it starts to become you. But when you put it on paper, it's not you. It's something outside of you. And again, it's very, very liberating, and can give you a sense of freedom. But from there, what we get to do is like, reposition, what do I want, for myself in this moment, instead, and so you don't have to do this stuff. Sometimes I'll just do a brain dump. And I'll leave it there. And I'm like, that's all I needed. But a lot of times, I want to experience something different. And so I started to think about I start to embody the version of myself, right, three years from now, two years from now, or the version of me that I just feel excited to be, which could be in any moment, right? I just get to decide that I want to be here, but I feel so disconnected from her. And so I write about her, this is how I want to think instead, this is how I want to feel instead, this is what I desire instead. And now we start to bridge the gap of where we're at the stories that we're telling ourselves, and truly who we want to be and step into. And that gives us that decision point to say Can I just be that today? Now a lot of times you just have to let that emotion process. It's not about fixing it, right? If you're journaling out of heaviness or your your brain dump and you're just really feeling overwhelmed. Sometimes it's you seen it and letting it just process. We're not judging it. We're not trying to change it. We're not trying to, you know, hack it, it's just simply like, seeing it for what it is. Let it in like sit in it. I mean, guys, a lot of times, you know, I think of entrepreneurship or just life of just learning how to be with uncomfortable emotion. And so as you brain dump, right, then you start thinking about what do I want instead? What do we want to like? What do I want to feel, and you're gonna have this collection. So this is where I love this it for me too is aside from the freedom of separating from the thoughts and the feelings and the emotions and just being truthful with myself about what's, what's real versus what's not, what's a story, and then reminding myself of who I want to be. And what I'm creating instead, is this documentation, this history of what you're creating, as you journal, every day, or every week, or whatever that process looks like for you. I had this fascinating. This fascinating experience a week or two ago, when I was journaling, I was feeling heavy, I was really trying to like sit into and again, me over analyzing everything, which is something that can be a strength, but alsoKinsey Machos:
kind of like my Achilles heels. Like I want to overanalyze everything, I need to know why I'm feeling this way. But as I'm just journaling about an experience, and I'm like, This feels really familiar, very familiar emotions, ball like body responses. And I started to revisit some older entries of my journal, at the beginning of the year, when I remember a season of I even did a podcast about it, the identity crisis. And I was like, you know, I feel like this might be that again, but I went back to those journal entries, and oh, my gosh, the similarities were ridiculously, ridiculously striking. It was like, I was writing things word for word. And it was in that moment that I realized, well, a, for one, it's like, Okay, I've been here before, right? So I'm not going to die, right? I'm not going to die of these uncomfortable emotions. I've been here before, but a I have been here before, and really seen a pattern. And you can start to really like when you have this history, and you have the documentation because you think you're going to remember, you know, I talked to my clients all the time, they'll they'll have a huge win, that they realized there was sort of like this aha moment. And I'm like, You need to write about it. Right? Because you will not remember even though you think you're going to remember it, you're not going to remember the details. And what created that or what was the result of that, or the the process you had to go through to get there. You won't remember those details. And so this history, and the documentation of that just gives you so much to draw from it and start to see some patterns, but some of which are totally normal and fine. But you can then get better at even breaking some of those patterns. Like why do I keep finding myself here? What are the things that I do that keep me coming back here. The other thing is probably the most important is you get to see how far you've come. Right? This, I think we get so wrapped up into the surface level results, well, I haven't hit 5k months or Ten K months or Hunderd k months yet I'm losing, this isn't working. And then you look back three months, six months, one year ago, and think about what was your life like, then what were you doing, then what were your problems, then they're going to be starkly different. If you're growing, they may not present as the result or the thing that you thought it would. But as you reflect in the growth and improvement and who you've become, that is the gold. And when you can remind yourself of that you can prevent yourself from completely self sabotaging yourself, because we get into these loops of this isn't working and I need to fix it and I need to run or I need to, you know, drop everything and quit or pivot or whatever, we see this a lot. This is this story of like this isn't working, you need to do something different. When all along it was working for you, you quit right before the momentum hit. So this the documentation and the history and then journaling can help you straighten that out. It can pick up the patterns, but it can also remind you how far you have come. Right. I was looking at old journal, I have so many notebooks right. And I was looking at an old one from a couple years ago. And I remember feeling like how am I ever going to replace my 100k salary. Mariah was making over six figures in corporate and it felt pretty overwhelming to think about replacing that as a solopreneur. And that was like my biggest fear almost it was sort of like, will I be able to do it, you know, does you know my husband is trusting me. Can I hit you know those eight to Ten k months and that was sort of the the consuming fear if you will, that I had to navigate then and like you know, that's like you know Like pocket change anymore, and the growth so it's like, I my problems are different and new, and they feel heavy, but then I look back and like, see how far I've come and grown. And the emotions I've had to navigate and the person, you know, I've had to grow into to get there and and feel so proud, I feel so proud. And I want you to feel so proud of yourself too. Because the surface level results are the thing that you thought you were working for, that you haven't gotten yet. You have no idea how far you come. But this process of journaling allows this very comprehensive, holisticKinsey Machos:
exercise for you to get gain that freedom, gain that clarity, get the brain like dump the brain, see what's real, evaluate, move on, revisit, right, improve, like, it's such a beautiful process. And I think when you come at things like that, so whether it's journaling or a morning routine, or, you know, finding a new diet, when you can understand, come in with it, like how will this benefit me? What do I want to gain from this? And how long am I willing to commit to it until I can really experience that that result that I'm seeking, you're more likely to not just be consistent with that habit or that thing, but you're actually going to amplify your results from it. So I hope this was helpful for when to see how I journal why I journal and how it could benefit you and why I would love for you to find a process that works for you. Because I do think it is something that it's a tool that you you will want to leverage as you grow as an entrepreneur in your life to but if you think about generally habits or things or you know, processes that you might feel like you're falling short on that can't You can't gain rhythm in this is you know, it's probably why you know, lack of vision, not understanding the why not having the commitment to see something through to get the result you're looking for in you know, that habit, that process or whatever. But then understanding what does it mean to you, right, asking yourself, What does this mean to me, and just pausing, right, because a lot of people are going to tell you what to do. But unless you know why it's good for you. We'll never be able to really see it through. So I hope this was helpful. And I just appreciate you opening your ears, your minds, your hearts for this message today, and I'll see you next time. Hey, you, thank you so much for listening. It's an honor to be able to pour into the hearts and minds of like minded entrepreneurs all over the world. But my most favorite part is being able to connect with you in real life. If you love what you heard here, head over to the community where thousands of female CEOs just like you are changing the world one human at a time. We go deeper into the topics you discuss here and give away tangible roadmaps to help you crush your revenue goals to join this high caliber free community head over to https://kinseymachos.com/community. A see you there